06 May 2008

whip it

One of the problems of being in the wishy-washy left camp is when something happens that disturbs the conservative beneath. Especially when, as age catches up, that underlying trait worms its way to the surface more and more frequently.

So, as the news showed an obviously repentant young man stick a single finger at the camera (*) after a court appearance for kicking a kitten to death, we were rent with conflicts. Because, essentially, this little waste of space deserves to get it all back.

As an aforesaid wishy washy etc etc, I am deeply opposed to the death penalty in all circumstances. Except, perhaps, unrepentant kitten killers. Just possibly the human race would be improved if this type simply weren't around.

No, that's surely a step too far.

Maybe we could give the family the chance to exact some retribution. Wouldn't that would be just? A little family kicking?

No, as a confirmed wishy etc etc etc, that's too close to "an eye for an eye." Wishies are beyond the Old Testament, surely (the old man called it "a survival manual for a nomadic desert race."

Anyway, the judge has reserved his decision.

Maybe the young bloke could learn to feed the tigers at the zoo. Without training.

On a happier note, the human formerly known as Princess Anne gave some kind of brooch to one of the other royals, some kind of apprentice soldier. Now, the news got it wrong because this person is now known as Her Royal Highness The Princess Royal which got me thinking: what does she put on forms? What's her given name now? "The?"

"What's your middle name?" "Princess."

Bring on the republic, because with the inevitable breakdown in law and order, respect for authority etc, we'll soon be executing kitten kickers.

(*) When I was growing up - a process still being undertaken, according to some observers - a rude gesture was two fingers held up, the 'V for victory' reversed. When and how did the single finger come to replace it?

I blame the Americans, but then I would.

It's part of being wishy washy etc etc etc etc.


Andrew Landeryou said...

Kudos to the conservative corporal/capital punisher within, Phil.

Cruelty to animals is not sufficiently harshly punished imo, at least in the People's Republic of Victoria.

While being fed to the lions might be a bridge too far to mix my Kevin Rudd metaphors, we can only hope that five days in jail is not the only punishment extended to psychopaths who kick kittens to death, in this case using such force that the poor little thing's liver was ruptured and kidney damaged to the point that it died.

Perhaps if his next victim walks on two legs, we might reflect that the punishment for those who are cruel to animals ought be increased to accurately reflect the depravity of the crime.

phil said...


Obviously to protect my wishy-washy status I'm going to have to execute, or at least tranquillise, the conservative within but this kind of mindless cruelty to animals just makes my blood boil.

And the bloody judge has now let him off. Words do not, etc etc.

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