Of deluded souls, yes, I have a few.
Anyway the main reason I post less is because I work more, and this is a trend unlikely to cease before retirement, now likely to be 67.
Ze message in zis for all of youse is learn ze patience.
I just got a quite amazing e-mail:
This email is intended to inform you that there is a record of deposited funds of $1.5 Million US Dollars in our bank, with your details by Steven Coleman Company Ltd. The funds is entitled to be your overdue inheritance contract payment.
That last sentence certainly had me thinking, partly about the things you probably think I was thinking about, and partly about others things I was thinking about in a perfectly independent manner.
Because, you see, I did once inherit some money. I've inherited money when playing Monopoly (mind you, not particularly bloody OFTEN) but no, once in real life.
It wasn't $1.5 Million US Dollars but enough to, I dunno, pay off the monthly credit card account. Which is probably what I did with it, this being some time ago.
No, it's the "contract payment" bit that has me quite bemused because, well, I can't remember the last inheritance being tangled up in contractual obligations and what-all.
I mean, I'd send what's-her-face my bank account details in a trice because, let's face it, with $1.5 Million US Dollars I could buy a lot of stuff.
F'r'instance, I could hire someone to write blog posts for me on a more regular basis that I am - as explained above - now able to achieve. More to the point, if I was really careful about selection and briefed a headhunter firm appropriately, I might be able to hire someone who could write better blog posts than me.
We'd probably have to rename the blog, probably shut this one down and call the new one something awfully spiffy like Middling Missives or Tales of the Completely Expected.
Alternately, I could buy a brace of Maseratis or similar and, let's be honest, I'm more likely to do that than offer Don Watson $1.5 Million US Dollars to remove the capital letters from everything that currently boasts them in inappropriate places.
Speaking of pedantry which, in a peripheral way, we were, just the other day I accused one of our executives of jumping on the 'around' bandwagon.
You know: "I've got some issues around that."
I tell you what: I have bloody issues around it. Anyway what I hope ensues is that every time he's in a meeting - and he goes to lots - and hears someone use the phrase because it's bloody everywhere, I tell you, he'll start to get annoyed.
But not as much as the first time he hears himself use it.
And he will.
Anyway, I googled the Steven Coleman Compnay Ltd. It doesn't exist. Which doesn't surprise me really because, I tell you, it's a really weird name for a relative, no matter how deceased.