24 October 2009

art of noise

It's not absolutely necessary, but every once in a while it's fun to get a reminder that organised religion really is a blight on humankind.

I was like.....like....what's the answer, Jesus dude?....
Britain is a nation of heretics and nothing can change the fact until your nation reverts back to Roman Catholicism.
(That comments thread is by turns quite, quite hilarious and deeply disturbing).

I looked for some other interesting stuff to link but there's nothing interesting anywhere. Everywhere I look, it's not interesting.

We bought Mrs VVB an iPhOnE today in what must have been one of the most deeply unsatisfying exercises in consumerism (ie buying something you want) in which I have ever been involved. Even being ripped off by second-hand car salesmen when I was younger was better than this.

For reasons that needn't be gone into here, we were happy to stay with the existing carrier (service? plan provider? some other blinkingly inane metaphor for supplier?). Also Mrs VVB had decided she wanted an IpHoNE and nothing else would do. So, a straight-up walk-in sale, "I'll have one of those over there please and don't spare the horses."

Given this you would think that the young salesperson, of the type the old man usually typified as a "popsy," could have negotiated her arduous assignment without pissing us off, but we were pissed off within the first 30 seconds with a series of demands for personal information that any passing Stasi recruiter would have applauded and stuck straight into the training manual. By about minute 3 I was asking her would she mind appending her snapped directions to us with the occasional "please." It didn't seem too much to ask, but she snapped that she had said please already. Must have been in Braille because I certainly missed it.

Well it took us about 15 minutes so it could have been worse. We eventually decided that popsy must have been either suffering from commission payment deficit or was so wired on something that it was a wonder her eyes didn't shoot across the shop and into the crowd.

Ah yes, the crowd. We left the shop clutching our IpHOOOne and what was left of our dignity and patience and slammed into....the NOISE! The PEOPLE, the NOISE, it was just horrific. No wonder salespersons are so stressed with (a) nowhere to sit and (b) all that NOISE just outside.

And people go to shopping malls voluntarily? As a form of recreation?

It's a wonder there aren't more murders.


Marshall-Stacks said...

They all fail to grasp the concept that YOU bring their salary through the door in your wallet.
I had been convinced that the city where I shop, has the worst retail attitudes in the country.
I had a good one only 2 says ago buying a birthday card ( $6.95 ) in a cutesy gifty shoppe.

Arrive at counter and place card and $10 together on flat surface.
Assistant is at register doing something.
Seconds pass, and to convey to me that she is Doing Something she started to verbalise whatever it was, in a mumbly way (like the dumb kids who used to read comics to themselves aloud).
She did not look up at me, or say "just one moment please".
A minute passed without meaningful interaction with the person whose salary I was providing.
If I wasn't medicated I might have committed GBH.

oh yeah - and all those personal details they MUST have to sell me anything with a simcard in it - to prevent terrorism. oh please.
I do hope Mrs V V B can enjoy her iPHoone without it reminding her of the ugliness

phil said...

The IpHooone is such a thing of beauty in itself - well, compared to my work-supplied blackberry it is - that I am sure it will soothe as well as only connect.

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